Category Archives: Poetry

Another Reality

I just have to say,
after getting barely any sleep last night,
I do wish you the best.
I do hope you can reevaluate your life
and figure out what you want.

I also hope you can prioritize your life again
but realize how big of a mistake
you’ve made
letting me go
and not keeping me a priority
like I’ve kept you as one.

I thought I’d be by your side
while you sort out your life,
your depression.
I thought I’d be there
with you
as you grow more into who you are.

I thought our love was enough.

I thought our love was stronger than this.
But I guess it wasn’t for you
as much as it still is for me.

I’m still in love with you,
and I don’t know how
to just let you go.

I don’t know how
to live my life
without you in it.

I guess I’ll just have to
take it day by day,
like you will as you figure yourself out.

I’m very proud of you
for being brave
and trying to take charge of your life.
I just wish
you were able to do that
and still have me in your life.

I thought I had decided
I would try to move on last night,
but I wake up this morning
feeling as if I’ve stepped into another reality
and this one isn’t mine.
Because you’re not in it.

I only wish you happiness
and I’m sorry
I wasn’t enough for you.
I love you.

I’m not sure when,
or if,
we’ll talk again,
so I’m saying goodbye for now.

Copyright (C) Jennifer Gioia 2019.

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When You Know, You Just Know

How do you know you’ve found the One?

Your soulmate.

The one you’re supposed to spend

Eternity

With?

Will he make you feel special?

Will he treat you better

Than you ever thought you deserved?

Will he know how to make you smile,

Make you laugh?

Will he know when to give you space?

Will he know when to just listen?

Will he know when you need him?

Will he know all your faults,

All your weaknesses,

All your flaws,

And still accept you

For who you truly are?

Will he think you’re the most beautiful person

To him

No matter if you haven’t showered,

Or just finished crying,

Or are hacking up phlegm?

Will he know how lucky he is

To have you in his life?

Will he tell you how perfect

You are

To him?

Will he shower you with gifts,

Material,

Spiritual,

Physical?

Will he take interest in your passions?

Will he encourage your wildest dreams?

Will he be honest

And

True?

Will he take care of you

The way you always imagined

But never said?

Will he challenge you?

Will he stand by you?

Will he love you,

And

Always remind you of that,

Every

Day?

How do you know you’ve found the One?

Your soulmate.

The one you’re supposed to spend

Eternity

With?

When you know,

You just know.

Copyright (C) Jennifer Gioia 2019.

Loving you is easy

Loving you is easy.

I always want to be with you

and do everything together.

We’re always on the same page,

on the same team,

in the same boat.

Loving someone has never been this easy

in my life.

That’s crazy for me to think about.

Every day

I feel so fortunate and blessed

to have you in my life.

Every day you show me more and more

why I love you

and how our love just keeps

growing

deeper and deeper.

More and more,

I am seeing signs of us

that we were meant to be,

that we were made for each other,

that you are my one and only.

Loving you is the easiest thing

I have ever done

and I hope to do it

forever.

Copyright (C) Jennifer Gioia 2018.

I know it’s silly, but

Do you believe in fate?

Do you ever think about fate?

What about coincidences?

Well, what about the chance of us growing up 30-45 minutes away from each other until you move down here when you’re 13,

And then about 10 years later, I move down here,

And then a year and a half later, we meet.

What are the chances of that happening?

Is it a coincidence or is it fate?

Is it predestined?

An already spun tapestry of our interconnected lives.

The thread of our souls already intertwined?

Or is the tapestry incomplete?

Slowly spinning more and more as the sun rises and sets,

And the thread of our souls may not look like they will meet

Until they eventually do.

In this tapestry we call life,

Our threads have already met.

But what are the chances we have so many similarities in our upbringing

For it not to be predestined and prespun?

I think about these things.

I know it’s silly, but

it gives me hope.

Copyright (C) Jennifer Gioia 2018.

I Deserve You

This is my first poem about you.

This is my first real adult relationship after college.

This is my confession to you:

I love you.

I haven’t told you yet.

It’s only been four months,

but I know this feeling,

and I’m sure in this feeling.

It’s crazy to think about it.

What’s even more crazy is the fact I’ve waited until now to know what I deserve,

and to not take anything less.

I deserve you.

I deserve to be treated with respect.

I deserve to be romanced.

I deserve to be called beautiful every day.

I deserve to have all my inspirations encouraged.

I deserve to have all my aspirations supported.

I deserve to not intimidate you

with my confidence,

with my happiness,

with my grit and determination,

with my success;

as so many men in the past have been.

I deserve to smile when it rains.

I deserve to laugh when I cry.

I deserve to overthink

and have you pull me backwards.

I deserve to try new things.

I deserve to explore new places.

I deserve to have fun.

I deserve to live life to the fullest.

All with you.

I deserve to be loved.

And I want to be loved by you.

Copyright (C) Jennifer Gioia 2018.

My Final Goodbye

I haven’t written about love

… or loss…

in a couple of years.

Life can grow so busy and routine.

You forget to stop and appreciate the moment.

You forget to appreciate all you have.

You forget how to keep your love life one of worth and value.

And you fall into a rut.

Not everyone welcomes change with open arms.

Some look through the peephole when change comes knocking.

Some run upstairs and hide under the covers.

Some open the door halfway to see what change wants.

Some open the door all the way and invite change into their home.

When it came to graduating college,

I welcomed change into my home.

When it came to moving to a different state,

I welcomed change into my home.

But when it came to attempting a long distance relationship with the man I loved,

I thought I was welcoming change into my home…

But what I really was doing was looking through the peephole.

It took 10 months of long distance to realize I wore blinders.

It took 3 months to realize I had fallen out of love…

It took 1 month to realize I felt like I was single

and no longer in a relationship.

It took 4 months after that to realize I had been making excuses for you.

It took 1 month after that to realize I was grieving.

I had fallen out of love with you.

I wasn’t heartbroken,

but I was grieving.

You were supposed to be the one and only man for me.

You were supposed to support me.

You were supposed to love me.

Instead, you pushed me away,

and I don’t even think you realized it…

It took me 6 months after I broke up with you

to realize you had been slowly pushing me away

since 2015…

People ask me if I regret wasting so many years of my life on you,

so many months waiting for you to grow up.

5 and a half years with you.

They ask if you were holding me back.

I was working full-time,

attending graduate school part-time.

I would have my master’s degree in two years.

You didn’t even have an associate’s…

only unused credits.

8 months have gone by since I’ve broken up with you.

8 months of reflection.

8 months to realize maybe I held you back.

8 months to realize maybe we both held each other back.

When I ended things with you,

I had felt single for the longest time,

I had felt like I put my life on hold for you,

but now I felt free.

I jumped into overdrive.

I met men.

I bought my own car.

I moved into an apartment of my own.

I dated a few men for a short amount of time.

I found out how I deserve to be treated.

I found out what I want in a partner.

I found out what I need in a partner.

And I found out how to look for that.

But I am done.

I am done grieving.

I am done thinking over what could have been.

I am done thinking about all the wrong things that happened between us.

I no longer want to be held back by us,

by what we had.

I wish you the best,

I truly do.

I want you to figure your life out.

I want you to find love again.

I want you to be happy.

But this is my final goodbye.

Autumn is my favorite season.

I think I finally realized why autumn is my favorite season.

It’s because once it really is autumn all the leaves on the trees are bright

yellows,

oranges,

and reds.

They remind me of carrot tops,

which is a term I’ve grown accustomed to throughout my life.

My strawberry blond hair,

I was born with a patch of it on my head.

I used to think it was a burden

with people always calling me a carrot top.

I stood out in a crowd

with my bright strawberry blond hair.

Sometimes I hated it,

but sometimes I enjoyed it,

and it helps me be that type of person that loves

to be the center of attention.

Kind of like the trees

and how they’re so bright,

and they stand out from the deep

forest green of those pine trees around them.

But I think it’s a good thing

that they stand out,

and I think it’s a good thing

that I stand out.

Autumn is my favorite season,

not just because of the beautiful foliage,

and the Halloween holiday,

and my birthday is in the fall.

But also because I can relate to those trees,

and they remind me of myself.

Autumn is my favorite season

because I finally feel like I fit in.

Jennifer Gioia (c) 2015